"'My God!' Why didn't I go in then? What would he have done to me? What would I have lost? And perhaps then he would have been comforted and would have told he his word."
Is she a martyr in a neurotic way, or just advanced in her spiritual practices? I am fascinated by her. -- Lola
from page 159-160, Volume 2 of original text
Pevear/Volokhonsky translation page 728-729